Are you married? If you are, are you also a parent? If you are married and a parent, how is your sex life? Depending on the age of your children and the size of your family, it might not be great. Many parents wish that they had a better level of intimacy with their partner and on more occasions. If you are one of those individuals, there are a number of steps that you will want to take to spice up intimacy.
When it comes to intimacy in a relationship, it is important to remember that more than the bedroom and sex is and should be involved. Does your intimacy only get started when you climb into bed? If so, there may lay the problem.
If you are a parent, you will want to consider using the service of a babysitter. This will enable you and your spouse to get out of the house and enjoy time alone. In fact, you can even have a “real,” date. Go to dinner and a movie with your spouse. Unfortunately, many married couples find themselves entering into a comfort zone that results in their relationship feeling more like a friendship than a marriage. Do not let your relationship get to this point. Dating is a nice and easy way to prevent that from happening.
In addition to hiring a babysitter, rely on a trusted friend or family member. What is nice about taking this approach is the comfort level. Instead of picking a babysitter out of a phone book, you are entrusting the care of your children into someone that you know and trust. This alone can result in you having a better time on a date. You may also feel more comfortable leaving your children with a trusted friend or relative overnight, as opposed to an unknown babysitter. What does this mean? It means that in addition to enjoying a traditional date, you may also enjoy a nice, sexual night of privacy, possibly at a nice hotel.
In keeping with childcare that will allow you and your spouse to spend some romantic, intimate, and quality time together, consider approaching other parents. Do you know the parents of your children’s friends? If you do, consider making a monthly arrangement with them. Let them keep your kids for one night and you can do the same for them. This approach is nice, as you are likely to feel comfortable living your children in the care of another parent. Also, remember that all parents find it difficult to seek privacy and intimacy. You may be doing the other set of parents a huge favor.
As important as dating is and can be to your relationship, be realistic. Not every night can be a date night. With that said, there are still ways that you can be romantic and intimate with your spouse at home. For example, sneak in a few hugs and kisses here and here. When your wife is cooking dinner, walk up to her, rub her back, and plant a kiss on her. When your husband is walking past you, stop him and give him a quick kiss. A simple kiss is enough to show your partner that you care and want to be intimate with him, without making your children, who may be watching, feel uncomfortable or out of place.
Another unique and creative way to keep the romance and intimacy alive when you may be unable to have sex or go on a date is the use of text messages. Do you and your spouse have and use cell phones? If you do, send them a sexy and seductive text message. Let them know that you can’t wait until they arrive home. Even if your partner is sitting across the room from them, send them a quick message. If you do not own or use a cell phone, know that a handwritten love note can be just as effective.
Also, avoid allowing the notion of a family bed. Creating a dedicated space for sexual play may be just what the doctor ordered to spice up intimacy. Think about fun ways to connect and explore with your partner. Build a sex room that speaks to your collective needs and fantasies. This could be your actual bedroom, guest room, den, basement, or other area you choose. Make sure that the space is off limits and even locked to prevent kids and other unwanted guests from discovering your playroom.
As you can see, there are a number of ways that you, as parents, can still have a happy and healthy sex life. Implement a few of these steps to help keep your relationship and its romance alive and well.